Every couple has them and every couple despises them. Those talks that you don’t want to have but need to have can be stressful for every couple. These types of talks usually occur when something big is coming up that may shake the relationship or if something has been bottling up for some time and is ready to come out. They’re never easy. But they are necessary for the longevity and health of the relationship.
These difficult talks are like spring cleaning. They are like maintenance to the relationship. No one wants to do it, but it must be done and you will be happy you did it afterwards. There could be a whole slew of reasons why you need to have a talk. Some couples will need to have these talks more and others less often. It all depends on where the relationship is and where it is going.
Let’s look at a hypothetical example to put this in perspective. Let’s say one of the parties is going to school or taking a new job across the country. For one, it’s the other party’s responsibility to be supportive of the moving party’s dream or future. The moving party should be clear with what he or she wants and explain why the move is important and necessary. The other party should just listen and try to understand the moving party’s point of view.
Leading up to the move, it’s important to have a difficult talk about where the relationship is going, what the plan is moving forward, and how you will get over this challenge together. Now, it’s important to note that there are a million ways you can have this talk. The best way is to do so with as little aggression as possible. Instead, come to the table with compassion and support. Showing the moving party that you are behind him or her 100% will not only be great for the relationship, but will also provide a healthy path of communication to talk about the challenge at hand. If the two parties choose to stay together, then there will more than likely need to be some give and take from both parties to get over the challenge together.
Difficult talks with your partner are never easy, but are necessary in most cases. The trick is to be honest, yet unselfish. Be supportive, yet expressive of your own opinion. The only way these conversations work are if both parties are honest and supportive of each other. Be mindful of your tone during these talks and make sure you are in the right setting to have an intense talk about your future. The only way couples will get through their challenges are together, so you might as well treat yourselves as one team.
Dabbl 